Saturday, June 04, 2016

Well, I shaved my head,
threw all my hats away.
I shaved my head,
threw every last hat away.
I let the sun turn my scalp red,
turn my scalp red every day!

Friday, October 11, 2013

Syria, seriously?

In the morning, bombs are falling,
in the evening, poison gas;
all the questions have been answered,
another test we did not pass.

People dead and peoples scattered,
nations gone, not yet forgotten,
where can we put the last survivors,
not in my backyard, we pray.

How many
buildings can we shatter,
people can we starve and slaughter,
children can we leave to screaming,
no one left to take them home.

When it's over, will we know
by the silence and the empty
place where once a nation stood

end of the world

there's nothing funny when there's nothing left
taking a life like a sneaking theft
make them work for it however deft

we stand for what we want to be
seeing what we want to see
going to the end of the world to be free

Saturday, August 24, 2013

( I'm sorry! )

How much wood would a Wood Duck duck
if a Wood Duck could duck wood?

A Wood Duck would duck as much wood as a Wood Duck could duck
if a Wood Duck could duck wood.

Thursday, June 13, 2013

Screw the Photon II !!

Those who have tried to master the art
Of taking this tiny flashlight apart
Will know what I mean when I growl and say,
I should have just thrown it away.

Tiny parts scattered across the table,
It’s a challenge to me to see if I’m able
To put them all back together again –
I hope I will, but I don’t know when.

They’re in a box now, hidden away,
Awaiting the light of a sunnier day.
Without better light and a magnifying glass,
This is a test I never will pass.

I need a new keychain LED.
Can anyone suggest a good one for me?
I’ve bought my last Photon, and that’s a fact,
Until they get together their act,
And find a way to replace the power
Without causing the replacer to glower.

There was a time, with fingers more nimble,
I could handle this chore,
Now each finger feels like a thumb with a thimble,
And I just can’t do tiny parts anymore.
I’ll go for AA, AAA, AAAA, or N,
But I don’t think I’ll want tiny buttons again.
Eric Blair

Go cat, go,
but what do I know,
except that the ASP
works perfectly for me

You see, the Photon crowd
cries out loud
and sings the praises,
ease of battery changes,
but if my ASP shoots craps
I'll just send it back
and they'll replace the battery
entirely for free,
so you see what I mean
when I tout the ASP?

Esav Benyamin

The ASP is a dandy light to squeeze,
And dangle from my keys.
But I need a light
For shining bright
For many more hours, please.

I need a flash
That will cost little cash,
But continue to brighten my path.

The batteries I'd like to switch,
Without the thought of an awful glitch,
Which would rouse my soul to righteous wrath!

But thanks for the clue,
And I know that I'll do
As you suggest;
If it's not the best,
At least I can use a few.

Size 15s

Without pretending that I can rhyme,
Please read my words if you've got the time.
If Photon II's screws are too hard to bare,
A widely known secret I'd like to share;
One more "I" me thinks is the key,
'cos there ain't no screws in a Photon III.

As for belonging to the Photon Crowd,
I'll admit as much, and say I'm proud.
The Photon II's got a lot of fans;
With nimble fingers and steady hands.
A suggestion though for an easier Photon life,
Get a girlfriend, mistress or even a wife.

Eric Blair

I've got a wife
and I've got a life
and even a light
that's shining bright
but my light for use in emergencies
is not my trusty ASP
'cause the light I use in which to see
is my bright white SureFire 6Z
65 lumens light my night
with Glock 23 it guides my sight
and this light is right, made for fight,
unlike the light of my ASP
which is rightly made for finding keys
like a Photon, but with a guarantee,
and should you toast the battery
ASP will replace it for free!
Photon shmoton, or so I say,
not much of a light and too much pay
In this same league is the ASP
and ASP is just right for me.

Dr. Seuss is on the loose
in the forums fighting boredom.
June 18, 2001


It's time to polish up  my knives;
for other men, to clean their guns,
and soon we'll see what use we have
for weapons that are so much fun
to buy and gaze upon, collect,
to show to all our friends.

But once we need to take them out to kill,
I think the fun ends.

Food prep

It's time to take my knives out,
and pick the one that's best,
and polish up its edges
and put away the rest.

It's time to slice and dice,
to cut up into pieces
the vegetables I've got to eat,
which should be quite delicious!

I know you'd love to join me
for a meal so well prepared,
where every little morsel
looks as though I really cared.

Sometimes I like to cook so much,
although I am not hungry,
I end up putting food away
for later, which is funny.

So stop by anytime,
I've always got a bite,
and even if the crust is dry,
the wine will be all right.

How the Swiss Army thrives

A neat little blade to cut the foil,
a spiral of steel to remove the cork;
how could you drink? the wine would spoil
without my knife and spoon and fork
to prepare a table in the wilderness.
I'd never settle for anything less.

A clue

A cutler who loved a good knife,
thought the butler had taken a life.
He pointedly asked
which detective was tasked
with collecting the clues, which were rife.

Sharpening skills for the hunt,
in questioning, he was blunt;
when it came to the chase,
he would win that last race,
and immure a malfeasant so base.

The Blade Show Atlanta Georgia 2002

A poem, a poem: however far I roam,
my heart is still inclined to home --
but don't you worry, I'm in no hurry,
this buying of knives is far more than a flurry!
I'm glad to fly off, and I'm glad to fly back.
It's only the money to rush off again that I lack!

My blades are never vicious and my friends are never knaves,
our hobby is of works of art, from beauty we will never part,
I fear the poets are the ones whose work it is that no one craves.

* ****** **** ****** *

When we go to knife shows
we don't go alone
and when we get there
who do we see
but other knife knuts far from home

We spend as much time
meeting friends
as looking at the knives
and if we buy that's only one
of many reasons for the ride

This is the Buyer of the Blade

A knife came today in the mail,
And I know I will try, without fail,
To cut up some thing,
And I hope it won't sting,
Like the time that I stepped on a nail.

The knives I collect, sharp and shiny,
Are often quite large, rarely tiny;
Whether sleek or more jagged,
Their edges, not ragged,
Will slice anyone who gets whiny.

Rudyard Kipling wasn't wrong
When he told us in his song,
"This is the Buyer of the Blade,
Be afraid!"
Well-armed can even beat the strong.

Monday, June 03, 2013

What survives

Deep in the forest the squirrels are quiet,
Something is coming that squirrels don't like.
Humans with rifles are coming to shoot them,
Nuts to all that!  They will all run and hide.

Swimming against all the cold rushing waters,
Game fish will struggle as long as they can.
Sensible fish, though, show much more acumen,
Following water that's rushing on down.

Birds of the air and birds of the water
Share the bright feathers that dinosaurs wore.
Once long ago, before the great asteroid,
Birds would have sunk their teeth into our throats.

A little cloud, a little sky, a little wet, a little dry,
Another day as life goes on to find its own way.